Category Archives: Live Action Films

Concert Films, Live Action Films

Taylor Swift: City of Lover Concert

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Original release date: May 18, 2020.

Rating: TV-PG

Length: 42 minutes

Background:

To really go with the background here, we have to discuss Tay-Tay herself. You know her. You probably have strong feelings in one direction or another about her. Maybe you love her! (Honesty: She’s really grown on me from guilty pleasure to just “I think I’m a little bit of a Swiftie”… “1989” was a great album and the new one is fun too). Maybe you can’t stand her because she’s been everywhere for the last decade or so!

As far as where you know Taylor from, that could range too. Maybe you remember her as the little country chick singing about boys. Maybe you remember her as the budding pop star singing… well, about boys. Maybe you remember her from that Jonas Brothers concert movie somewhere on Disney+. Maybe you know her from Kanye doing his thing. Maybe you know her from newfound discovery of speaking her mind (which has been great).

Or maybe you know her from “Cats.” I hope not.

That leads us to the almost present and this “City of Lover” concert special. After the 2019 release of her album “Lover,” there were touring plans that were largely destroyed by the Coronavirus.

However, a few overseas stops happened including one on September 9, 2019 in Paris as an album release concert. It was recorded and gave us some video of the first live performances of many of her “Lover” songs. (She also performed some classics but they didn’t make the special.) ABC picked up the special and aired it, followed by immediately tossing it on both Hulu and Disney+.

Review:

I’m going to be honest with you… there isn’t too much to draw out into a huge review here. This isn’t a drawn out concert documentary with intercut segments of Taylor doing things backstage or talking to her cats. It’s just Taylor in front of a crowd. How much you like Taylor will directly influence how much you like the special.

There are a few minor “filmed backstage on an iPhone” cuts of Taylor playing songs that were lead-ins for commercial breaks. Remember those?

The audience is a very pro-Taylor crowd, as you’d expect, and sing along with everything. It helps. It’s a bit of an intimate concert compared to the gigantic stadium show she has on Netflix. There aren’t constant costume changes and it’s mostly Taylor, a spotlight, and a guitar. A lot of it is even acoustic.

We start with a band-included performance of the ultra-sugary “Me!,” missing the usual added energy of the Panic! at the Disco guy but still fun.

Then Taylor throws the band away and goes acoustic for several new album songs, including “The Archer,” “Cornelia Street,” and hit song “The Man.”

She continues her solo performing with a move to the piano, performing “Daylight.” It’s pretty.

We do get a little color at the end, getting some pink and blue graphics, a band, backup singings and a performance of Taylor’s equality anthem “You Need to Calm Down.”

After that, we slow it down for the finale and the title track “Lover,” which is a great song and will probably be played at every prom for the next twenty or so years.

Extras:

Trailer! Just a trailer.

Should you watch it?

I’m going to be biased and say yes, watch it. It’s an enjoyable show and it really spotlights that hey, she’s become a pretty good musician outside of just the pop music thing. Plus it’s under an hour long. Give it a whirl.

Live Action Films

The Haunted Mansion

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Original release date: November 26, 2003.

Rating: PG

Length: 1 hour, 29 minutes

Background:

Welcome, foolish mortals… to the Haunted Mansion.

That’s what you hear at the beginning of this movie as well as your entry into the Haunted Mansion theme park attraction, the basis that led to this movie.

The attraction first opened in 1969 in California’s Disneyland, followed by versions at Florida’s Magic Kingdom in 1971 and Tokyo Disneyland in 1983. Originally thought of as a walk-through haunted house by Walt Disney, it morphed into a ride-through attraction that is one of the most beloved attractions in all of Disney. It’s my favorite.

The early 2000s brought the idea of making movies out of several Disney theme park attractions. One – “Pirates of the Caribbean” – spawned a blockbuster series. Another, “The Country Bears,” was…. well, it happened. “The Haunted Mansion” landed somewhere in the middle ground. (A “Tower of Terror” film started it all in 1997 and hasn’t landed on Disney+ yet and is generally not spoken of.)

The big draw for the movie was Eddie Murphy, who spent most of the 1990s and 2000s in family films. He acted in the “Nutty Professor” series as well as “Dr. Doolittle,” and voiced popular characters in “Mulan” and the “Shrek” series (The Shrek Cinematic Universe).

Besides that, the store itself was expected to be the draw. It’s based on the amazing theme park ride. It’ll be great, right?

Critics and viewers mostly panned it. It did double its budget, therefore technically making it a success, but has largely been forgotten.

A reboot was announced at San Diego’s Comic Con in 2010 but, ten years later, has yet to surface. Gulliermo del Toro, an Academy Award winner for fantasy films, has been attached to it and, as recently as 2019, still has interest.

An animated series was announced for Disney Channel and Disney XD in 2014 but was later cancelled before production.

Review:

Foolish mortals will note how great the film does look in HD. The mansion – which is the star of the movie – looks amazing. The set designers and prop teams did a thorough job in making it look old and haunted.

The actual movie, though.. well, it certainly is a movie.

The cast – especially Eddie Murphy as Jim Evers as well as the entire Evers family – do the best they can with what they have to work with. They don’t have much to work with, however.

The writing is fairly boring, with the occasional goofy comedy and a little ghostly romance thrown in. The ten minute theme park ride has a better story than the half hour movie.

Theme park fans will be happy to see some characters make appearances. Master Gracey, mansion owner, is around. Jennifer Tilly portrays Madame Leota, the floating gypsy head in the crystal ball, while Disney Parks favorites the Dapper Dans appear as the singing graveyard busts.

The enormous Haunted Mansion fan in me walked away from this viewing – and many other viewers – disappointed. It’s fine. It’s a good enough movie. It isn’t great. Nobody is going to hype it up as amazing, but it’s a decent use of an hour and a half.

Extras:

All you get is a one minute clip of the movie.

Should you watch it?

Just as a fan, I’m going to go with watch it. It isn’t amazing, but it’s a good little family film with roots in Disney history. Eddie Murphy really tried.

Live Action Films, Star Wars

Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones

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Original release date: May 16, 2002. It had a premiere in Tribeca on May 12th.

Rating: PG.

Length: 2 hours, 22 minutes

Background:

A long time ago in a galaxy far away… I did a recap of Episode I. Rocket back to it and you’ll find why George Lucas decided to do a prequel trilogy.

Episode I was a tremendous success, so of course Episode II wasn’t far behind. The film premiered at the Tribeca Film Festival, then made an appearance at the Cannes Film Festival before debuting worldwide.

It… did well. Surprised? Of course not. Worldwide, it brought in over $649 million, though with inflation adjustments it still stands as the lowest grossing live action Star Wars movie of all time.

It has, of course, been rereleased on every home media format imaginable.

Review:

Let’s knock out the technical aspects first. The sound is fantastic. The HD is beautiful and the computer generated imagery looks fantastic.

I feel like I was hard on Episode I in my last review. I said I liked it, but it was a very wavering “like.” Maybe because, out of the prequel trilogy movies, it is the one I’ve seen the most by a good number of times.

Episode II is far superior. It starts out interesting, which is something I can’t say about Episode I (again, maybe because I’ve seen it so many times and played through the beginning on the LEGO game a lot).

I’m just going to give a loose summary again because I don’t want to spoil Star Wars. Count Dooku is threatening the Galactic Empire. Following an assassination attempt, Amidala is put under the watch of Anakin Skywalker as well as Obi-Wan. We are years in the future, so Anakin is no longer a little podracing child but a Hayden Christensen instead.

We find the planet of Kimino, where an army of clones – perhaps set to attack! – are being made for the Republic. I’m going to skip a bunch of middle details here, but there’s a lot of fun fighting involving Yoda, Samuel L. Jackson, and loss of limbs (a Star Wars tradition!).

There is some really fun stuff at the end that kicks off the “Clone Wars” story that spawned an animated movie and companion series as well as sets us right up for the next Episode.

A lot of the things people complained about in Episode I were alleviated in Episode II. There’s more adventure and less taxation. Jar Jar? He’s still here, but in smaller doses and 100% more tolerable. There’s plenty of character development, too.

Now, my updated best-to-worst rankings:

1. Episode 2 – Attack of the Clones

2. Episode 1 – The Phantom Menace

Extras:

Like Episode I, we have a few here but not the sizable amount you’d find on a Blu-ray. There are considerably less than there were for Episode I.

Trailer – It’s a trailer and it is a minute long.

Deleted Scene: Anakin and Ruwee – Did you know Ruwee is Anakin’s father? 47 seconds might help you understand that. I wonder if Anakin is a father.

Deleted Scene: Anakin’s Nightmares – Anakin’s nightmares only last 58 seconds? Lucky.

Deleted Scene: Extended Speeder Chase – If you count 54 seconds total as extended, you’ll love this. We do get more Zam Wesell in this, and she’s a character I wish we had more of, so there’s that.

Deleted Scene: Padme’s Parents’ House – Today on MTV Cribs, take a two minute tour of the home of a senator’s parents.

Deleted Scene: Raid on the Droid Control Ship & Extended Arena Fight – This one gets three minutes and some weird editing, but it’s here.

Should you watch it?

Yes. It’s a Star Wars movie. Watch it. Even on the “not a Star Wars movie” scale, I’d recommend this one. Character development, scenery, and action are all many steps ahead of Episode I. There’s not a bonus feature really worth your time, however.

Live Action Films, Star Wars

Star Wars: Episode 1 – The Phantom Menace

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Original release date: March 19, 1999. It had a premiere in Los Angeles on March 16th.

Rating: PG.

Length: 2 hours, 16 minutes

Background:

A long time ago in a galaxy far away…

… George Lucas decided he needed some more money. The original “Star Wars” trilogy was a smash not only in theatres but toy aisles across the world. Money rolled in. Lots of money. It’s like a Jedi mind trick took over the entire world.

In the early 1990s, Jedi mastermind George decided to start development on a new trilogy… a prequel. The advancements in CGI really helped fuel his interests in developing the stories.

The original three movies would be retitled as Episodes Four, Five and Six. The first prequel, releasing in 1999, would take on Episode One as its title as “The Phantom Menace.” New characters would meet characters from what were now later episodes, with CP30, R2-D2 and Yoda all appearing in Episode 1.

An all-star list of names joined the film, including Liam Neeson, Ewan McGregor, Natalie Portman, Samuel L. Jackson, and Kiera Knightley.

Upon premiering, the movie didn’t do very well. It opened with a gross of over $64 million, and went on to pull in $924 million. I guess it did okay.

It was rereleased in 3D in 2012, opening with another $22 million and grossing, in 3D alone, $102 million. True story: this is the only of the nine main “Star Wars” films I saw in a theatre. I saw the 3D rerelease and fell asleep. It was the only time I’ve ever fallen asleep in a theatre. I’m sorry, George.

Review:

First, let’s talk looks. It looks great. The HD is fantastic, colors are strong and pop, and CGI looks great. The sound is great as well.

Now, about the move. Episode I is very divisive in the Star Wars fandom. Truthfully, any movie that isn’t one of the originally three is divisive.

Personally, I enjoyed it this time around. It was long… too long. We could have lost half an hour somewhere in this and not have actually lost much.

The most divisive thing that happens in this movie is Jar Jar Binks. Poor Jar Jar. Jar Jar, with his Stephanie Tanneresque “How rude” and all, was clearly designed for children and weirdos like me. He’s annoying, childish, and goofy. I don’t think he’s as bad as everyone says, but I get it.

The other new characters are quality additions to the Star Wars Universe and fit in well. Queen Amidala and Emperor Palpatine especially fit in well, but nobody is a better fit than Darth Maul. Darth Maul, as is tradition with characters named Darth, is just amazingly cool. He has an amazing look and a DOUBLE-SIDED LIGHTSABER. How is this cool guy the bad guy? I sure hope nothing horrible happens to him in this movie.

The movie has confusing moments. The opening scroll, one of the things everybody knows about Star Wars movies, this time includes the word “taxation.” Why. There’s a lot of political dealings and arguments really, which I guess exist in the Star Wars universe as well, but theirs end with lightsabers and Jar Jar Binks. There’s also podracing, which would lead to a good video game.

Unlike most of my movie reviews, I feel bad spoiling Star Wars movies. Even ones from 1999. If you want to know details of how it ends, Wikipedia is your friend or you can of course watch it.

As I review the nine main Star Wars movies, I’m going to rank them. Here’s our rankings so far. Guess what’s #1 out of the one movie I’ve watched this time?

1. Episode 1 – The Phantom Menace

Extras:

We have a few, but nothing to the extensive length you’ll get if you go buy the Blu-Ray or the boxed set.

Trailer – Yep, it’s a trailer and it’ll take a minute of your life. Do you need a trailer to go see a Star War?

Deleted Scene: Anakin’s Return – Anakin returned. It took all of 17 seconds, going by the runtime.

Deleted Scene: Bail Organa of Alderaan – 19 seconds, but an interesting one for SW nerds. Bail Organa, as portrayed by Adrian Dunbar, was cut from Episode 1. The character was recast in Episode II with Jimmy Smits, so this is a rare opportunity to see the original Bail.

Deleted Scene: Battle on the Boarding Ramp – Another 19 seconds. I said cut the movie down half an hour, but they just chopped off twenty seconds here and there.

Deleted Scene: Complete Podrace Grid Sequence – This IS a good one. At six minutes, you can even count it as an actual scene. As you’d expect, this is the c omplete podrace sequence. Characters were cut out of the final version, but they’re here!

Deleted Scene: Extended Podrace Wager – Yep, it is as titled and for a minute of time.

Deleted Scene: The Battle is Over – Another whole twenty seconds.

Deleted Scene: The Waterfall Sequence – What happens when Qui-GOn, Obi-Wan, and beloved Jar Jar go over a waterfall? Take one minute and see!

Deleted Scene: Trash-Talking Droids – Robots talk trash! 27 seconds of trash!

Should you watch it?

Spoiler alert – I’m going to say watch it for all nine movies. It’s the Star Wars trilogy. It’s hardly the best of the movies (or even its trilogy), but it looks fantastic, the characters are fun and the kids will love it. Excluding the podrace segment, the deleted scenes aren’t worth your time.

Live Action Films

Disneyland Around the Seasons

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Original release date: December 18, 1966

Rating: TV-PG. “Contains tobacco depictions.” “It may contain outdated cultural depictions.

Length: 51 minutes

Background:

If you’re reading this when it was originally written – 2020 – you know we are in the middle of the Coronavirus lockdown. If you’re reading this in the future, congratulations… you survived the Coronavirus.

For the first time ever, all Disney parks around the world are closed for an extended period of time. The only way to see the rides is to hop on YouTube and watch ride-through videos or some of the many, many, many vloggers doing their thing and making exaggerated faces at the camera.

However, thanks to Disney+, there is one movie that will take you there. Well, it’s kind of a movie.

“Disneyland Around the Seasons” originally aired as an episode of “The Magical World of Disney,” the long-running Disney-oriented series that was off and on for many decades. In this 1966 episode (not 1967 as Disney+ tries to tell you), which has now been declared a movie by the team at Disney+, one Walt Disney gives us a look at new developments at Disneyland, Walt’s original park.

The program originally aired three days after Walt’s death, service as both a salute to Disneyland and a tribute to our Disney king.

Review:

We’re going to take this review step by step instead of overall as we would with most movie reviews.

We kick off with Walt himself in a room of the figures that would become the children of “it’s a small world,” that attraction with the song that is now back in your head.

Walt kicks us back to the beginning of Disneyland’s second decade, with New Year’s fireworks kicking off behind Sleeping Beauty Castle and the Mark Twain riverboat full of people with sparklers, which seems dangerous but they lived wild in the 1960s.

“Every day is a holiday” at Disneyland, exclaims Walt, as we see various shots of Disneyland with things such walk-around Three Little Pigs characters. We also see many shots of guests in the stereotypical Native American feature headbands, something we definitely wouldn’t see in 2020.

We also get footage of a man with a jet-pack blasting off from Tomorrowland and flying around the castle, kicking off the second decade with futuristic style.

Back to Walt and the “it’s a small world” kids, the newest attraction at Disneyland. We even see a scale model of the Disneyland entrance clock of the attraction, which is pretty dang cool. This takes us to a live shot of the real entrance clock doing its thing. For those of you who have only experienced the Magic Kingdom version of “small world,” it’s pretty well known that the Disneyland version is vastly superior. The song, however, remains the same and will annoy you either way.

We see video of the “small world” opening ceremonies, including a jovial Walt driving a car in a parade with dancers in various countries’ outfits. Children from every nation were special guests of the dedication ceremony and yes, they were made to sing the song. Water from the major oceans and seas of the world were dumped into the waterways of the ride.

We watch as Walt and the children ride the ride, which is basically a ride-through of the entire ride with some occasional Walt commentary and definitely some angles you won’t usually get riding it yourself. If you go for a ride-through video on YouTube, you’re very likely to not see this 1966 version of the ride. The ride has been updated to include “small world” style animatronics of some popular Disney characters such as Woody and Alice amongst the children of the world.

Up next, Walt discusses his personal admiration of Abraham Lincoln and the creation of “Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln,” detailing how much work went into the attraction. This segues us into some video of Animatronic Abe in the attraction making his speech. Even for 1996, the work and movements put into the Lincoln animatronic is impressive. The video goes noticeably grainy here, probably because it is a fairy dark attraction and this is in no way HD (but looks good in most spots!).

We head to New Orleans Square, a new land at Disneyland at the bend of the river. Walt gives us a history lesson of the Louisiana Purchase, which gave us a hunk of land for $11 million. In comparison, Walt notes, New Orleans Square at Disneyland cost the company $15 million.

To the video we go with a look at the grand opening of New Orleans Square, with a look at the authentic details of New Orleans smattered throughout the construction. We get some footage of a Jack McBrayer lookalike playing banjo and a dude with a giant cigar watching him, probably the cause of the warning. We get some jazz band action to really excite the crowd as well.

We cut right out to dinosaurs, which definitely weren’t in New Orleans Square. This is for a peak at animatronic dinosaurs and the primeval world, something that was a feature of the Disneyland Railroad ride-through for a bit.

Enough of that drama though, as it’s CHRISTMAS TIME. Walt shows us models of characters and costumes for the Christmas celebrations including “Fantasy on Parade,” which is – you got it – a Christmas parade.

We get a lot of angles and views of the parade, including a walk-around Mickey beating on a drum to kick it off. We see other walk-around characters like Donald, Winnie the Pooh (and his terrifying tree), and Eeyore. These costumes have come a long way.

Captain Hook rides though with Smee, Peter Pan, and the whole crew. Hook is terrifying. A rare walk-around Dumbo appears as well.

Pluto rides though with a dog house and ACTUAL DOGS IN DRESSES AND WALKING ON TWO LEGS. Worth the watch alone, really. Mary Poppins and crew dance around to “Step in Time” while a character I didn’t know existed in walk-around form, the Reluctant Dragon, walks though as well. This is fascinating.

Goofy, looking similar to nowadays, rides through in his hunk of junk car with Minnie. The car naturally goes nuts, shooting actual fire into Goofy’s butt and squirting him with water. I’m starting to realize this is the entire parade.

Snow White and the dwarfs march through. It’s kinda cool to see a Snow White with just her hair and not the wig they all wear now. We also get a pretty clear look at the human face inside of a dwarf hat, something that is far improved in modern day.

More characters roll though, including characters from Fantasia, Alice in Wonderland, and a giant chicken with a cigar. Why not. There’s also a terrifying scarecrow band scarier than anything at Universal’s Halloween Horror Nights.

This all leads, of course, to Santa. Looks just like ’em! This takes us away from the parade and into the Candlelight Processional, with choir members marching and singing religious Christmas songs down Main Street.

Walt thanks us for coming, letting us know they’re working on new stuff.

The special ends with a look at next week’s episode, looking at “The Truth About Mother Goose.” That does not exist, thus far, on Disney+.

Extras:

No extras for you.

Should you watch it?

If you are curious at all about the theme parks, 100% watch it. It’s a fascinating look at some classic attractions and the parade alone is worth your hour.

Disney Animated Films, Live Action Films

The Reluctant Dragon

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Original release date: June 20, 1941

Rating: G. “Contains tobacco depictions.”

Length: 1 hour, 14 minutes

Background: You’d think, going by the poster and name, this was an animated movie about a dragon who is, perhaps, reluctant. You’d be wrong.

“The Reluctant Dragon” came out during the 1941 Disney animators’ strike, so it isn’t all new animation. In fact, the film is a hybrid of live action studio tour and animated shorts.

There wasn’t much cultural impact, but the Dragon character – yes, there is one – appeared again in “Who Framed Roger Rabbit.”

Review:

Our picture starts out today in black and white at the home of Robert Benchley, best known for his Academy Award-winning short “How to Sleep” as well as magazine columns and radio work. His wife is suggesting he sell the rights to the book “The Reluctant Dragon” to Walt Disney.

They eventually hit the road and make it to Walt Disney Studios. They tell the security guard they have an idea for Walt and he lets him right in. That easy, huh?

This is a glorified studio tour, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Robert sneaks away from the worker taking him to Walt, instead stopping at the art studio (this is where he meets a guy lighting up a cigarette, hence the disclaimer).

After a pratfall, Robert meets the art crew. In this case, they have an actual elephant in the room as they work on drawing it. Hmm, it’s almost like there’s an elephant movie coming up soon. Robert is apparently very anti-elephant, unloading several jokes about them.

His next stop is a film score and vocal recording session, seeing an orchestra play music. He sits next to a gentleman who turns out to be Clarence Nash, the voice of Donald Duck. Florence Gill, the voice of Clara Cluck, comes in and sings in… chicken. Clarence joins her to sing in Donald voice, delighting Robert. The whole scene is a delight, really.

The next stop on the accidental studio tour is a foley session, which is where they record sounds for movies. They’re recording for Casey Jr., complete with clips, which is neat to see. Casey Jr. is also featured in the upcoming “Dumbo” film.

Robert finds his way into not only the camera room but also color himself, as the film goes from black and white to color as he enters the room. He sees the giant multiplane camera, getting a look at it from above. The multiplane camera is part of the genius of Walt and crew, invented for the process of making animated films.

This leads into a demonstration of Donald being animated, complete with Donald coming to live full of sass as always.

The “Rainbow Room” is next, full of paint. Good thing we went to color, huh? The artists are mixing colorings and painting up a deer that I think we might just see in a very depressing film sooner than later.

This is followed by a trip to the maquette department, where they make… yep, maquettes. Maquettes are clay statues they use to see characters from all angles. The guard who lost Robert way earlier finally comes searching for him, so Robert ducks into a closet.

Next is the storyboard department, drawing up sketches of a character called Baby Weems. I have no memory of this character going anywhere. They have an actual baby in the room they are using as a model to sketch. As the baby leaves to rest, Robert gets sucked in by the storyboard artists to listen to their pitch.

We get the whole Baby Weems story though storyboards, complete with voicework and very slight animation effects in a few of the boards. Baby Weems would have gotten the “skip it” treatment, sorry. There are some VERY stereotypical animations of characters from other countries in this part.

The chase continues and Robert ducks the guard some more, ending up in the animators’ room with famous animators like Ward Kimball. This leads to a preview of “How to Ride a Horse,” a new Goofy short.

The Goofy “How To” shorts would become a staple, with this first one eventually being rereleased by itself. I’m not going to review the short itself here, as I imagine at some point it’ll hit Disney+ by itself. It’s good though!

We return to live action and a theatre, where Robert has found Walt Disney himself. He prepares to pitch “The Reluctant Dragon” to Walt, but decides to wait until after the feature playing.

That feature? “The Reluctant Dragon.” Yep, Walt found the book first. Nobody is surprised.

The story of the dragon is definitely something. The Boy (that’s his name) meets the dragon, who is friendly and a fan of poetry and not the scary dragon you’d expect. Sir Giles arrives in town to fight the dragon. The dragon tells him that he is a peaceful dragon and will never fight. They go back and forth for a while, eventually staging a pretend fight which leads to the dragon being accepted into society.

As the short ends, we close on Robert and his wife riding home. She’s harassing him because he didn’t sell the picture to Disney, instead wandering around. And that’s the end.

Extras:

All you get is a 1 1/2 minute clip from the actual dragon portion of the film.

Should you watch it?

Yes, watch it. The actual dragon portion is the weak spot in an otherwise strong and fun movie. It is a very interesting behind the scenes look at how things happen.

Live Action Films

Swiss Family Robinson

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Original release date: February 8, 1940

Rating: PG for parental guidance. “It may contain outdated cultural depictions.”

Length: 1 hour, 34 minutes

Background: As of this blog posting, this 1940 adaptation of “Swiss Family Robinson” is the oldest live-action film on Disney+. It is notable for many reasons.

Most notably, this 1940 version isn’t necessarily a Disney movie. Originally released by RKO Radio Pictures, the film received decent acclaim and was nominated for an Academy Award, namely Best Special Effects.

It is said that Walt Disney decided to make his version after seeing this version, but went out of his way to make sure this version was forgotten. This included buying the rights to the RKO version, keeping it from being re-released and hiding it away in that notorious Disney Vault. The Disney version was released in 1960, something I’ll review in another… twenty years of catalog titles.

Up until its full release on Disney+, the 1940 version mostly remained in the vault. A 20-minute part of it was thrown into the special features of the 1960’s modern day DVD release, the only appearance of any of the film on a Disney DVD release. The film itself did get a very brief release as part of the Turner Classic Movies Vault Collection series, but the run on that ended almost as quickly as it started.

The cast included names like Thomas Mitchell, Edna Best, and Tim Holt (no relation to Steve Holt). I don’t know them, but I do know the one uncredited role in the movie… Orson Welles. Orson played the narrator, his first credit in a feature-length film.

Review:

The movie – black and white – does start out with the Disney castle start as well as the RKO Radio Pictures symbolism, followed by the normal (for the time period) opening credits sequence.

A mishmash of scenes – dancing, champagne pouring – introduce us to William Robinson’s application to leave England with his children. This is your first chance to notice that yeah, this is a black and white movie from 1940. Lots of film blemishes appear, but you’d kinda expect that from a film Disney has mostly kept hidden for decades.

We meet Jack Robinson, dressed like the guy from Panic! at the Disco dresses in 2019, returning home to greet his mother Elizabeth. We then meet another Robinson child before William himself returns home. The Robinsons are mostly jerks to their servant.

William announces to the family that he’s done something crazy. He’s not a fan of how his children have acted in England. So what has he done? He’s sold it all and resigned from his job… kids, we are moving to Australia!

The family board a fancy ship – thanks to a time jump – and are forty days into their voyage by boat to Australia. It’s clear the ship was a set and the ocean behind is video, but it is what it is. This is matched up with the classic “line on map” animation, showing the ship having travelled from point A to point B.

There’s a surprising amount of cattle on ship, something we notice as the weather goes from decent to “Wizard of Oz” levels of bad. All hands on deck! A large dose of ACTING! shows the crew astray before on-screen text tells us the ship was washed ashore. Whatever shall they do?

First, the Robinsons have to get their entire farm full of animals off the boat and onto land. This involves some intercut construction scenes, creating a raft and other flotation devices out of barrels. While donkeys bray on their swim through the storm, the Robinson men paddle the barrel raft.

The crews all make it through the storm, the animals – real animals, no CGI here – swim and frolic in happiness while the family takes in the random land they’ve stumbled upon. They begin to make camp, but you can’t help to notice characters have perfectly styled hair. We know y’all just went through a storm.

Adjusting to island life isn’t easy for the spoiled brat kids, having to – gasp – wash dishes. This includes teaming with dad to leash a very large, very fake turtle, which helps their vessel go a little faster.

The movie slowly drags on, but hey… here’s another storm to get caught in! This time dad passes out mid-storm, which is pretty impressive, leaving the kids to man the ship. They are capable enough to hit land right near the family, bringing dad back to reality and doing… things. I’m bored, y’all.

The family finds a giant tree, deciding to build a treehouse around it. The family get things built, learning to adapt to their surroundings for cooking and cleaning. Well, “adapt” as in “make pretend good faces about mom’s adventurous survivor cooking.”

The gang learns to hunt, gathering both food and clothing options from their kills. Very pleasant.

This is the point I’m going to be very real with you all. This movie lost me at about the hour mark. It was on but it lost all interest for me. Is it because I’m an 80s baby trying to watch a movie from 1940? Is it because we are used to continually action-packed movies like “Endgame” now? Or is it just a really boring movie?

It’s a really boring movie. It might have been great in 1940. It was in Academy Award talk (granted, a lot of movies nominated for Academy Awards in 2020 also bore me). In 2020 though… my attention span can’t take it.

I noticed no cultural depictions.

Extras:

Clip – There is one clip taken straight from the film that lasts just over a minute.

Should you watch it?

I’m sorry. I tried. This gets my biggest skip it recommendation. Maybe it is a generational thing, but I don’t think it is. I think it just wasn’t that great.